Yes, it’s another 3 AM morning. I’m beating myself up for how I reacted in a meeting yesterday. Not because I behaved unprofessionally or inappropriately but because I was “too direct.” I’m equally pissed at myself for not keeping my mouth shut (they already think I’m a raving bitch) and at the injustice that still—even after 25 years in my career— makes that nasty voice inside me say “well maybe you should learn to just STFU.”
The patriarchy demands women be gracious, polite, even-tempered, mild-mannered, and, most of all, silent. I am none of these things. And the patriarchy does not deal kindly with women who refuse to behave as though we’re less whatever than men.
I was reading today’s WaPo article about Megan Rapinoe. She is a phenomenal athlete, out and proud, and a total badass. She’s also “controversial” because she won’t STFU about gender equality and LGTBQ rights (among other issues related to inclusion and diversity). The article’s title is “Megan Rapinoe isn’t here to make you comfortable,” and I thought “that’s fucking right.”
I will persist; I will maintain my self-respect and authenticity. I will embrace the truth that I am not here to make people “comfortable,” I’m here to live fully and colorfully, here to love robustly, here to “Dare Greatly” (shout out to Brene’ Brown). However, I’m not so delusional as to believe that I won’t pay the price for walking this particular path of feminist righteousness.
Readings
Megan Rapinoe isn’t here to make you comfortable - Jerry Brewer, Washington Post, Jun 26, 2019
Soccer star Megan Rapinoe suggests men ‘take a few hundred years off’ from leadership roles - WITW Staff, Jan 30, 2019
Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead - Brené Brown